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Hystory Mystory House

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Hystory Mystory House

Coherency is for the Weak.
 
 

Some say born and raised near Carbondale PA.  Although, not, as my sister maintains, by wolves, but by people. 

Either you know me or you don't. If you don't, too bad, so sad, maybe later. If you do, my condolences. I am the surprise around the corner, but not in your cereal box, because I never really liked chickens anyway. I try to exude all those things that I wish I had and I am working on my second face, because everybody needs a second face to meet everyone else's second faces with. You are advised not to get between me, my music, my animals, or whatever it is that is bothering me this week. Everything else is probably all right until it gets reclassified.

First large performance - 500+, Johns Hopkins CTY at Dickinson College. I opened the talent show singing "Cherish" by Madonna - Peach light in an octagonal hall in 8th grade... I fell in love with performance. 

Early Influence - Ed and John Kerber.  I learned the art of projection from Mr Ed Kerber while practicing for a school show.  Many sore ears are still looking to lynch the man.
 
Dabbling - Local musical theater shows, high school shows.
 
First Time Making My Own Melody - UBMS at PSU - Mark Toci, English teacher and absolutely excellent guitarist.  He wanted me to sing for him while he played something, and I told him I didn't have words..  So he tossed me a poem by Edgar Allen Poe. 
 
Favorite Early Band - Met Carl V J Shinko at District Chorus.  I drove every weekend to Dallas, PA, to sing and sort of play keyboards with him, Mike Trosan, and some other awesome musicians.  We played a show at one of Lackawanna Trail's School dances. 
 
These guys were the first ones to let me sing Candlebox.  I still love "Far Behind", and you can always ask me for my acoustic version.

First Time Playing for Someone Else's School Show - Pitched percussion at Scranton Prep for "West Side Story". 

Original Draft of Class Prophecy - I accidentally nuke the eastern seaboard.  I hear the vice-principal axed that version and I ended up doing something boring. 

First Song I Ever Wrote About Something That Hadn't Happened Yet - "Might Have Been".  Immediately after I thought it was finished... I asked somebody to listen to it.  He said no.  I wonder if anything would have been different if he had.  He didn't have another chance to hear it. 

College - I majored in sleep-deprivation, with the help of some real and ersatz vampires.  State College saw the beginning and ending of my LARP and MUD addictions.  I officially became an RPG Geek as well as a Comic Geek, and briefly joined the Army of Steve.  I went out for Women's Chorus and ended up in the touring group, Concert Choir.  I got to sing on tour of Toronto, and we all got to sing on stage with Kenny Rogers.  I got to shake his hand and he said, "It's not Christmas until the Choir sings". 
 
PSIDE - Penn State International Dance Ensemble, was a truly familial experience.  I learned music by rote in many different languages.

Home Again - I began composing.  Inspired by Dave Neubauer, I took up guitar.  I joined Singers Guild, did some local opera with NPO, did some shows with Diva theater and practiced with several bands that didn't get off the ground.  I played some open mic nights.  

Metal to Metal - I was fired from a crappy bank job, so, I answered an ad looking for a female vocalist for a metal band.  I thought, "why not?".  The guitarist sang, and I played keyboards.  At practice I was sitting around, lamenting that I needed a job, and the drummer said, "Come to the Shack".  I was going to the job fair the next morning, but I'd hit his store on the way back.  That day was September 10th, 2001.  I'm an ex-Shack manager, and not playing with the band anymore.  But we had a blast.

I'm still writing.  There's a lot of stuff around me.   Do you want to be next?

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Me @ American Idol auditions in DC 2004 5AM!

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Me Driving the Now-Defunct Painted Car

©Kimberly Fortuner 2007. All lyrics ©1994-2007. Music ©1993-2007.